Lies

    ME: Some lady just came to my dorm and told me that I have been selected to join an honors society and congratulated me on my 3.25 gpa, but that is not true! Should i still fill out the forms???
    MOM: yes, continue your life of lies.
3 years ago 252 notes
"What if jazz was squirrel slang for something terrible, like anal intercourse? ‘Oh, I like it too,’ she’d said — and so eagerly!"
— David Sedaris
3 years ago
I don’t know if I’m ready for this, Pittsburgh.

I don’t know if I’m ready for this, Pittsburgh.

3 years ago 1 note