Lies ME: Some lady just came to my dorm and told me that I have been selected to join an honors society and congratulated me on my 3.25 gpa, but that is not true! Should i still fill out the forms??? MOM: yes, continue your life of lies. 2 years ago 250 notes
"What if jazz was squirrel slang for something terrible, like anal intercourse? ‘Oh, I like it too,’ she’d said — and so eagerly!" — David Sedaris 2 years ago
